As we welcome the new school year, we, as parents have the opportunity to start it right. With messages of, “Rush here, hurry there,” and “I must get from one activity to another,” the pressure of over-scheduling our children (and ourselves!) can dominate our day-to-day activities. Why do we, as parents, feel pushed to over-schedule?

One reason seems to be that many adults feel that an abundance of structured, goal-oriented activities will help prepare children for a top-ranking college and a successful career. Another view is that children who are exposed to an array of “enrichment” activities will be better prepared for adult life. A third explanation is that many parents believe the earlier you expose a child to structured learning, the faster he or she will learn and the more academic they will be. It is not uncommon to see parents enroll pre-school children in multiple extracurricular activities and accelerated academic programs in hopes of getting a step or two ahead.

However, according to experts in the field of child development, this is just not so. Recent scientific research supports the theory that self-initiated, unstructured creative play is the single most important activity that young children can engage in to develop at all developmental levels, including neurological and cognitive growth.

Children today have half as much free time as they did 30 years ago, notes a national study of 3,500 children ages 12 and under, released by the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research. Contrary to popular belief, doing “nothing” is not necessarily wasting time. In fact, having time to observe, explore, fantasize and engage in imaginative play is extremely productive. It is exciting to think about this unstructured time as an opportunity to become more resourceful, self-reliant and resilient. In addition to independent, free play, there are endless opportunities for hands-on, intellectually-stimulating activities parents and children can do together (see “Unstructured Fun” sidebar).

Often, the joy of just being a kid is taken away when we pressure and over-schedule our children with activities. It can also lead to many physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, insomnia and anxiety attacks. Children need time to be creative, dream, imagine, play, and interact with other children without adults directing the activity. And, it’s even okay for children to be bored once in awhile.

While there is no “right” number of activities for every child, it is important to make sure your child is not over-scheduled and has plenty of downtime. Make a plan to carve out some unstructured time each and every day. It’s certainly okay to enroll your child in a structured activity, and as the child gets older, even more than one. The key is to find the right balance for each child.

12 Warning Signs That Your Child May Be Overscheduled

If you notice your child presenting two or more of the following behaviors on a consistent basis, he or she may not be getting enough downtime. If so, it might be a good idea to re-evaluate his or her schedule. (Source: Scholastic.com)

  1. Acts significantly more grouchy or irritable
  2. Trouble falling asleep at bedtime
  3. Difficulty finishing homework; grades slipping
  4. Overeats
  5. Zones out in front of  TV
  6. Complains of stomachaches, headaches or mysterious illnesses
  7. Grumbles about being bored
  8. Over-anxious about gaining approval from authority figures
  9. Throws tantrums or “loses” equipment when preparing to leave for activity
  10. Picks fights with siblings or complains about not being loved
  11. Trouble keeping track of where he or she should be
  12. Schedule is draining to any of the family members

Unstructured Fun

Here are a few hands-on and mind-stimulating activities the whole family can participate in together. Adapt these activities, as needed, depending on the age of your child. Also, ask your child for his or her ideas for more activities. (Source: PasadenaISD.org)

•  Take outings to interesting places, such as the library, museums, parks and hiking trails.
•  Make a scrapbook together of places you visit (older children may enjoy keeping a journal).
•  Allow children to plan menus and help with grocery shopping.
•  Bake and cook together.
•  Play sports and games indoors and outside.
•  Play board and card games.
•  Encourage your child to create his own game and play with him.
•  Provide a variety of creative experiences such as arts and crafts, music and movement, and performing skits or plays.
•  Encourage child to find and use recycled items for art activities and games.

Recommended Reading

  • “Miseducation: Preschoolers at Risk” by David Elkind, Ph.D.
  • “Take Back Your Kids: Confident Parenting in Turbulent Times” by William J. Doherty, Ph.D.
  • “The Hurried Child: Growing Up Too Fast Too Soon” by David Elkind, Ph.D.
  • “The Over-Scheduled Child: Avoiding the Hyper-Parenting Trap” by Alvin Rosenfeld, M.D., and Nicole Wise
  • “The Power of Play” by David Elkind, Ph.D.
  • “Your Child’s Growing Mind” by Jane M. Healy, Ph.D.

Sharon Long, M.S., is the Parent Education Coordinator, Prevention Services at Centers for Youth & Families.