Editor’s Note: There are instances—chronicled daily—of people’s lives torn apart by substance abuse and depression. Some are high-profile like that of creative genius Robin Williams, while some are cases of local teens harming themselves or others. All are troubling. All are heart breaking. All are preventable. Little Rock Family is partnering with The BridgeWay for a series of four articles over the next few months called “Voices” to provide the perspective of a significant adult in a child’s life, the child themselves, and the professional’s points of view. Everyone needs to be heard and understood when dealing with addiction and subsequent depression. It is our hope this series of articles will encourage someone to seek help and healing before it is too late. (See Part 1 of this feature here.)

The Teacher's Voice

After Melanie had arranged the parent-teacher conference with Beth, Suzanne’s mother, she began to wonder how she would articulate what she wanted to say. Although Suzanne’s grades were improving, she was not the same student she was when the school year began. Something was amiss but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. She was concerned about Suzanne not just as a student, but as a person, too. “Hopefully,” she thought, “Beth will see that.”

“Thank you for seeing me,” Melanie said. “Of course,” Beth said while taking a seat.” “I realize we just met in September to talk about Suzanne’s grades…” “And they’ve improved,” Beth interjected. “Yes, her grades have improved,” Melanie replied, “but I’m concerned about her behavior.” “Oh, what’s going on?” Beth asked.

“It’s not any one thing, really,” Melanie said, “more like a combination of things. After our last parent-teacher conference, Suzanne moved from the front of the room to the back. Assuming that she may have resented me for her grades, however, I didn’t think much about that. Since then, she has gravitated away from her friends to a new group of friends. “We’ve noticed that, too. What do you know about her new friends?” Beth asked. “Well, they don’t have Suzanne’s academic track record, so to speak,” Melanie replied, “but Suzanne seems less enthusiastic about school and her extra activities than in the past.” “We’ve noticed that also,” Beth said. “Other than spending time with her new friends, she isn’t much interested in anything else.” “And has she mentioned the headaches to you?” asked Melanie. “Not at all,” Beth answered. “She cries and complains of headaches almost every day,” Melanie said, “but she refuses to visit the school nurse as I’ve suggested.”

“I can certainly see why you called me and I’m glad you did,” Beth said. “Ever since her grades dropped, Mike and I have been worried sick, but we know this isn’t just about grades.” “That’s true,” Melanie said, “although she’s doing the work and her grades have improved, it seems like she’s just going through the motions. “Again, thank you so much,” Beth said while getting up to leave, “I’ll talk with Mike to see what we can do.” “Yes, and if you wish, I’m happy to meet with you and your husband,” Melanie offered.

The Adolescent's Voice

“I’m so sick of my teachers messing with my life,” Suzanne said after her mother told her about the parent-teacher conference with Miss Melanie. “If my grades are getting better, then what does she care where I sit or who I sit with,” she fumed. “I’m doing what I can to keep up,” she thought, “but Mom just keeps pushing me and pushing me. I wish they’d let me quit cheer or council and leave me alone…Maybe I should just run away.”

The Professional's Voice

“As we continue to watch this situation from afar,” says Megan Holt, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services at The BridgeWay, “some of Suzanne’s behaviors could be attributed to alcohol or drug abuse or depressive symptoms, as well as the adjustment of being a 13-year-old. It is not insignificant that she changed her seat in class. As an educator, Suzanne’s teacher should be commended for identifying and addressing the behaviors she observed. Suzanne may have moved from the front to the back of the classroom because she felt guilty or ashamed about her grades dropping. Perhaps she felt sad about her grades and didn’t feel as though she fit in with her friends anymore. Then, when her teacher shared her concerns about her grades and behavior with her parents, she may have perceived that feedback as rejection. Those are tough emotions to manage for anyone but especially during adolescence. Substance use only adds to the feelings later, so that one ends up even more guilty and ashamed,” says Holt. “Considering all of these factors together, Suzanne is at risk of suffering from a mental health disorder.”

“The behavior of a depressed child differs from that of an adult, so parents should seek help if these symptoms persist,” says Holt.

  • Frequent sadness, tearfulness, crying
  • Frequent complaints of physical illnesses such as headaches and stomachaches
  • Poor concentration
  • Low self-esteem and guilt
  • Extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure
  • Increased irritability, anger or hostility
  • Thoughts or expressions of suicide or self-destructive behavior
  • Decreased interest in activities or inability to enjoy previously favorite activities
  • Poor communication
  • Difficulty with relationships
  • Talk of or efforts to run away from home

“I’m equally as concerned for Suzanne’s family as they deal with her behavior,” says Holt. “It is difficult for many parents to watch their child struggle with emotions and the changes associated with growing up. Yet, as long as they seek help, there is still hope for Suzanne and her family.”