Parenting in Petit Jean with Stephanie Buckley
Stephanie Buckley is one of those truly interesting people you meet who seem to embrace their lives wholeheartedly. Oh, there are many layers to this sweet, southern Vidalia onion. Those layers are undoubtedly the traits responsible for the popularity of her blog where she describes herself as “a wife to a man of true integrity, homeschool mom to two buckaroos, small famer, city council member, farmers’ market manager, freelance writer, and maker of cool things out of the refrigerator box.”
Joe and Stephanie Buckley have been married 14 years. They met at the Southern Women Show in Memphis, Tennessee when she was the Marketing Coordinator for Baptist Health Care Corporation. At the last minute after an employee quit, Joe had to man the State Park booth at the tradeshow. His booth was across from hers. She flirted with him. A few months later he had a layover in Memphis. That’s when they had their first date.
Joe was born and raised in Louisiana. Stephanie says, “He spent most of his younger years being raised by his grandparents—amazing people who walked with integrity and loved unconditionally.”
Born and raised in Mississippi, Stephanie says, “I grew up in a Southern Belle mentality and went to college. I never really thought I’d be a stay at home mom, much less a homeschool mom. I wish we could take credit for all the amazing in our lives, but God made the plans. ”
They now have two sons, Finn, 11, and Hays, 8. She describes life before the boys, “We slept more. Traveled further. Worked out more. Life was slower.” Her favorite piece(s) of parenting advice she’s received goes like this, “Enjoy it all. It goes by so fast. Be a parent. Be fair. Be diligent. Take it serious and make it a priority.”
Stephanie shares with Little Rock Family what it’s like to be The Park Wife.
LIttle Rock Family: What is it like to live in a state park?
SB: We try to be good stewards; leave everywhere a better place; impact people’s lives in a positive way; be a part of our community. Oh, and it is loud, full of dirt, mud, and a lot of laundry.
My husband was the Ranger here at Petit Jean when we married in 2000. He was then promoted to Assistant Superintendent. We moved to Historic Washington in 2005 where he was Superintendent for seven years, to Ozark Folk Center for 18 months and in July of this past year we came HOME to Petit Jean.
We have an amazing community here. Most of the people are retired. One neighbor is a real live astronomer. We have engineers, school teachers, master gardeners, and so many others that share their wisdom and kindness with us. They are all part of our family.
How does your lifestyle inspire and impact you and your family?
Our life is family centered, a benefit of homeschooling and living on a park where my husband works. With me being home with the boys and Joe home every day for lunch and limited commute, our world is very close-knit and comfortable. Joe shows them cool stuff that happens and takes teaching opportunities. He hopes that one day they put all the pieces together and see more of the puzzle. My husband is my biggest fan and has always encouraged me and supported me with blogging and everything else I do.
The boys and homeschooling are my priority. I wake up early and work on The Women Bloggers. And then spend about an hour or so after their school on blog/social media work. They are also a part of it. They go with me and people love meeting The Buckaroos. They are pretty cool little gentlemen.
How did you decide to homeschool?
When our oldest son was 3 and we had a new baby, I treasured the vibe our little family had created—hanging at home, cooking, playing, going to the library, and creating massive art projects out of materials that are now referred to as recycling. As it was getting close to the time to start planning what to do about school for Finn, I was not ready to give up our lifestyle. Two wonderful women were placed in my path who were successfully homeschooling their children and provided guidance as I prepared on this journey.
Our first year of homeschooling consisted of pretty much the same thing we had been doing the year before, but with more reading and sounding out words. I would ask my son what he was interested in that week and he would say “The Titanic” or “Indians” or “horses” or “maps” or “dinosaurs” and off we would go to the library to get stacks of books on said topic, bring them home, spread them around the living room floor, and read. And then we would go outside and play.
Homeschooling styles vary from family-to-family. For us, homeschooling is more of a way of life than a segment of our day. Homeschooling has given our family so much time and freedom to be together and helps to control the pace of our lives. We try to focus on helping our kids realize the world is their classroom—that there is stuff to learn everywhere.
Describe a typical day of homeschooling and life in the park.
I’m a relaxed homeschooler, which basically means I needed a legitimate-sounding description for not holding my own feet to the fire when it comes to following a rigid, Excel spreadsheet driven school schedule. But, what I have found after six full years in the homeschool trenches is that this approach is the best fit for me and for the boys.
We wake up and snuggle on the couch, get dad off to work and then do chores. At 9:00 a.m. we start school and are usually done with book work by lunch. The afternoons are spent on projects, outside play, field trips, homeschool group, library, etc. We love living in a rural, beautiful area and the freedom to explore and enjoy time with each other. Homeschooling turns education inside out in the best way. Instead of sitting inside a classroom to learn about the world, you go out into the world to learn directly.
What is some advice you could give to parents considering homeschooling?
Homeschooling isn’t for everyone—if it doesn’t appeal to you, don’t do it, because it will probably not go well. It is a huge responsibility and, like all things, there are peaks and valleys. Most beginning homeschoolers, in their enthusiasm, bite off more than they can chew and try to do too much. For the first couple of years, I focused on reading to my kids, having them read to me and learning the basics of elementary math. All other subjects like science and history were explored through the Bible, a unit study curriculum, good books, good PBS and History Channel shows, good cooking, good yard work, good playing and good cleaning of bathrooms!
It makes a huge difference to be part of a homeschool group. You meet other families that have embarked on this journey. You receive guidance, friendship, and great ideas.
Don’t buy the whole socialization issue—we let the boys choose one sport a year to go along with 4-H and homeschool co-op, if not we would be spending too much time in the car. Of all the homeschooling myths out there, I think this is the lamest. Also, all children no matter how they are educated (public, private, homeschooled), are gifted, so try not to get caught up in that whole “homeschool genius” thing.
What are the pros and cons of living in the parks?
The boys have gained the appreciation of being able to go sit by the lake and do their math, that learning about the Civil War included dressing up and volunteering during Civil War Days, science can be done on a hiking trail, but most of all, that we are called to leave a place better than we found it.
What have your children expressed about their goals and aspirations?
Hays wants to be a first round draft pick for the New Orleans Saints, then retire from NFL and be an engineer while fighting evil, like Chuck Norris. Finn wants to be a character designer for movies. On the side he will design weapons for the military and be a demolition expert. He also wants to live at the beach and run a summer camp.
What was your inspiration for starting your blog?
I started The Park Wife blog back in 2006. I am considered an old-timer in the blog world. It has always meant to just be a love letter to my children. In 2009, after waiting in line for 4 hours for my blog world friend Ree Drummond to sign her first cookbook, I figured I might not be the only blogger in Arkansas. So, the next day, I put up Arkansas Women Bloggers site. Five years later, we have over 560 member blogs, are planning our fourth social media/blog conference for September in Rogers, are providing content for some amazing Arkansas companies, and have created a community of women who gather, grow, and connect online and in the real world.
Buckley Family Favorites
State Parks: Hobbs in Northwest Arkansas, Devil’s Den and Mount Magazine, but of course, Petit Jean is #1!
Favorite Game: We love to play UNO at our cabin. The boys used to want to play Chutes & Ladders and Candyland so much I had to “hide” them.
Favorite Meals: On the weekends, Joe cooks a big breakfast for us. We also love Petit Jean bacon and cheese hot dogs.